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Category Archives: places

Who let the dogs out? At Grünewaldsee… – überlin

Who let the dogs out? At Grünewaldsee…

by Zoë Noble

Last week was our 13 year anniversary (eeek!), so to celebrate we packed up Olive and her friend Edna, and headed to Grünewaldsee for the day. We’ve been there a few times and the Hundestrand is one of our favourite places to go in Berlin. You can let the dogs off the leash so they can frolic with their furry friends while you chill and eat guacamole like a boss. Below are a few iPhone snaps of the day – dog pervs, enjoy!

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Doggystyle: Emma and Doris – überlin

Doggystyle: Emma and Doris

by Zoë Noble

Doggystyle Portrait
“I’m looking after Doris for a month.

I used to have dogs back in New Zealand, and eventually I’d like to get one here too. But back home you can have a garden and leave the back door open, and it’s a little more difficult over here. But if you’re used to having dogs, and put in the time and effort, it’s fine.

Doris is very calm, but then suddenly skits out, and gets really playful and excited. When she’s really excited, she can’t control her limbs and kind of looks like she’s having a spasm. She comes up and shakes and does this little T. rex move, and it’s really funny.

But she’s a really good family dog, really gentle, and gives lots of kisses. ”

Doggystyle Portrait

Doggystyle Portrait

Der Adlershofer Fundus: Prop House – überlin

Der Adlershofer Fundus: Prop House

by Zoë Noble

There are some places in Berlin that you can’t quite believe really exist. The Museum of Things is certainly one of them, Spreepark another, and now… Der Adlershofer Fundus. This prop house is completely unassuming from the outside, the exterior giving away nothing of the size and scale of what lies within. Walk down a few flights of stairs and the first thing you’re greeted with is the cutest little dog called Fundus… awwww. Once Fundus gives you the OK, you head into a warren of corridors. Filled to the brim with objects, clothes, set pieces and weird oddities from almost every decade, the sheer scale of the collection is jaw-dropping.

We wandered for hours, soaking it all up – around every corner a new era or object or mannequin to be terrified of. It just kept going, so I kept snapping. If you’re in the film industry or you need to build sets, then this place needs to be on your radar. I will most certainly be coming here when I need props for my next photo shoot, that’s for sure!

Der Adlershofer Fundus Telephones Der Adlershofer Fundus Terrier Dog Der Adlershofer Fundus Soldier Der Adlershofer Fundus Bottles Der Adlershofer Fundus Stuffed Grizzly Bear Der Adlershofer Fundus Clocks on Wall Der Adlershofer Fundus Retro Cameras Der Adlershofer Fundus Typewriters Der Adlershofer Fundus Milk Pales Der Adlershofer Fundus Wall Hangings Der Adlershofer Fundus Knomes Der Adlershofer Fundus Doll Der Adlershofer Fundus Lights Der Adlershofer Fundus Retro Televisions Zoë in Mirror Der Adlershofer Fundus Bags Der Adlershofer Fundus Stuffed Crocodile Der Adlershofer Fundus Medical Area Der Adlershofer Fundus Doctor Mannequin Der Adlershofer Fundus Prams Der Adlershofer Fundus Books Der Adlershofer Fundus Antlers Der Adlershofer Fundus Chairs Der Adlershofer Fundus Pottery Der Adlershofer Fundus Vintage Clothes Der Adlershofer Fundus Wigs Der Adlershofer Fundus Vintage Clothing Der Adlershofer Fundus Disco Ball Der Adlershofer Fundus Vintage Clothing Der Adlershofer Fundus Batman

 

3 Responses to “Der Adlershofer Fundus: Prop House”

  1. Eric Noble says:

    You could spend hours in there I bet….it looks amazing…what a find!!

  2. What a properly amazing place! Hours of fun. And terror.

  3. Natalye says:

    Wow….. so very cool… and creepy!

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Chutnify – überlin

Chutnify

by James Glazebrook

Chutnify Curry Restaurant Berlin

It’s no secret that most Indian food in Berlin, and no doubt the rest of Germany, blows. It seems that most spices imported from the subcontinent are sent straight to Currywurst stands, without so much as wafting over the city’s actual curry houses.  The situation is slowly improving, however, and Berlin has decent tandoori and Sri Lankan places, and now somewhere to get freshly-made dosas.

Chutnify is a colourful and cute little eatery in Prenzlauer Berg’s alarmingly clean Kollwitzkiez. It specialises in the South Indian equivalent of a crêpe, full to bursting with minced lamb, tandoori chicken or vegetarian alternatives, and served with a tantalising selection of chutneys. We recommend trying the mixed platter, which includes the spectacular Mumbai beach snack Bhelpuri and two delicious dosas, asking for everything “Indian hot” and doubling down with the sauce they call “the Chillifier”. If you do go overboard on the spice, you can always cool off with the surprisingly good mango cream, served with marscarpone and fresh basil.

Chutnify may not serve anything as hot as your favourite curry house back home, but it is surely the most authentic taste of India that you’ll get in this fair city of ours. Check it out and see what you think!

Chutnify Curry Restaurant Bottles

Chutnify Curry Restaurant Berlin

One Response to “Chutnify”

  1. papaerk says:

    Looks lush x

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California Breakfast Slam – überlin

California Breakfast Slam

by James Glazebrook

We’ve *hearted* California Breakfast Slam since it was based near our old Kiez, before it shut down and then magically popped up a few streets away from our new flat! Berlin’s best Mexifornian (?) brunch is currently based on Pflügerstrasse in Neukölln, although according to their hilarious, ranty Facebook Page, they’re looking for a permanent home in the neighbourhood. Our advice: get down there and enjoy the heuvos rancheros or two eggs plate (with turkey sausages and pancakes) before they go all nomadic again!

8 Responses to “California Breakfast Slam”

  1. […] up, Charles Sammons, who I’ve seen busking in California Breakfast Slam and Schönleinstrasse U-Bahn station. The Virginia/Washington DC native is in town, composing for […]

  2. papaerk says:

    looks yummy to me guys but not to often so you can really spoil yourselves now and again.

  3. I need me some Mexifornian. Maybe fo lunch?

  4. Adam says:

    YUMMM! I’ve had the heuvos rancheros and two eggs plate the past two weekends. Love the turkey sausage!

    • James says:

      We can’t get enough! It’s turning us into right fat shits!

    • Ben says:

      I can second the heuvos rancheros recommendation. Also, nice coinage on the “Mexifornian”–never heard that essentially the cuisine we’re talking about here… (On further review, yes it exists—http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mexifornia—though not without some unf. xenophobic overtones. Whatevs. It describes what I think you’re trying to call the equivalent of TexMex, ayet?).

      • James says:

        Overeating and xenophobia? I’m basically an American!

        I joke of course, I’m just sore to find out I didn’t coin that phrase. Everything really has been done hasn’t it?

        A little surprised we didn’t see you at Cabslam! Next time, yeah?

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Blub : überlinüberlin

Blub

by Zoë Noble

Berlin is bursting at the seams with amazing abandoned buildings and it’s pretty shocking how few I’ve actually visited. I’ve no idea why, because for a photographer they’re so bloody interesting to shoot. Rotting away and ripe with the stench of history, it’s hard not to feel a bit creeped out walking around them, all the while snapping colourful glass crystals and eye-popping graffiti. Well I got off my arse a few weeks ago and visited a deserted leisure centre called Blub, and it didn’t disappoint. Check out my photos below (plus Danilo’s lovely portrait of yours truly!) and read more about Blub and how to get there on Abandoned Berlin.

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On blogging: The great "viral content" swindle – überlin

On blogging: The great “viral content” swindle

by James Glazebrook

Günther Krabbenhöft street style original photo

You may have seen this dashing fellow on the Internet recently. You might have even seen these photos. If you did, the site you were looking at stole Zoë’s photos, published them without her consent, and used them to generate traffic and, most likely, revenue.  

It all started when So Bad So Good shared some photos to their Facebook page, of the alleged 104-year-old, posing on the platform for the U1 at Kotti. It isn’t clear where they got those images from, as they didn’t include any kind of credit. But we do know that the man pictured, Günther Krabbenhöft – represented by “agents for unique characters”, We Are Unlike You – isn’t 104. More realistic estimates put him at around 70.

Spotting an opportunity, I commented on the post with a link to our own blog post, a streetstyle shot of Günther walking through Graefekiez. Sure enough, that brought us a lot of clicks – about 40% more traffic than in the previous month – but it also brought the attention of websites that pride themselves on finding and sharing viral content. They refer to it as “sharing”, but we call it what it is: stealing.

The biggest, and probably the first, of those was Bored Panda (no, we aren’t going to link to them!). We found them via a trackback, a notification that WordPress sends us whenever someone links to one of our posts. Clicking through, we were shocked to see Zoë’s photos being used in a post that (apparently) now has over 180,000 views, 50,000 Facebook Likes, and is surrounded by ads that make money for the site’s owners. Alarmingly, there’s an “Add post” button that allows anyone to create their own article, with terms of use that place the responsibility for copyright compliance on the “author”.

The offending article on Bored Panda

Bored Panda set the tone for all the other articles we were able to find through trackbacks and Google reverse image search (which we learned about from @eljojo – thanks!) Have a look here – each of those thumbnails leads to at least one article that has used that image in those dimensions. That’s just one of our three images of Günther, and it doesn’t included photos edited beyond recognition by Google’s bots.

Most of the articles we found included the 104, many with that weird get-out that “the Internet” is getting its facts wrong, and all featured images alongside ours from sources who presumably weren’t contacted for permission either. A lot of them completely ripped off the “original” Bored Panda article. But, as it’s not their content anyway, why should they care?

When we contacted Bored Panda, we received an email from the article’s author saying that they’d decided to remove the images. The fact that they responded so quickly, to an email sent via a form that actually has a field for “removal request”, leads us to believe that they subscribe to the school of thought that one should “ask for forgiveness, not permission”.

Günther Krabbenhöft close up

Bored Panda were only closing the barn door after the horse had bolted. By the time our images were taken down from that site, they were all over the “viral” Internet. It takes just one website to turn stolen content into fair game, and other sites are happy to rip off photos, as long as they include the name of the source, and a link to it. Those second-tier sites are legion, and rarely have contact details through which to demand a removal.

A couple of bigger websites approached us for our permission (denied), and, when pushed, a national British newspaper offered an insubstantial amount of money. Given the circumstances, we were almost flattered that people had thought to ask us, but Zoë can’t pay her rent with “credits”, and we can’t build an audience on the clicks of curious people wanting to ogle an apparently ancient “hipster”. Our uptick in traffic came primarily from my comment on So Bad So Good’s Facebook post, and those people won’t be back. If we were playing the same “viral” game as these websites, those clicks would translate into money. But we aren’t – we’re focussed on creating original content.

And that’s the most depressing part of all of this: watching the Internet cannibalise itself. As soon as one online entity had a “hit” with the Günther photos, everyone else had to have them. Major newspapers and best-selling magazines aren’t above this – everyone wants the hot new thing to post, in the hopes that their improved Google rank will inch their audience, and profits, up ever so slightly. This “viral” layer of the web relies on content creators like us to thrive, but we won’t be able to create the content it needs if we can’t make a living. It’s pretty disgusting to see this up close.

So where does that put us? We’ve been advised that we are in a position to demand our content’s removal from all these websites, and to even invoice them for the revenue they likely generated from it. But how do you contact a site that doesn’t feature so much as an email address, and what are your chances of getting a response, let alone compensation? Right now, we’re focused on INTERVIEW.de, who aren’t responsive despite me taking to Twitter and Facebook to complain (sound familiar?) We think they’re taking Andy Warhol’s art of appropriation a little too far…

Let’s be clear: we love it when you share our content. When you tweet one of our photos and @-mention us, you could bring us followers; when you link to our website, we may gain readers. Sharing the photo without a credit isn’t exactly in the spirit of Twitter, but at least you wouldn’t be making money from our creative work. To all our genuine fans, thank you for sharing!

And to all the people out there creating unique content, keep up the good work. Take solace in the fact that this is one of the few cases of plagiarism we’ve (knowingly) experienced, and it can be traced back to us “putting ourselves out there”. Let us know if you ever encounter anything like this, and we’ll be happy to share our learnings and give you some support. Together, we’ll kick some web ass!

Günther's kick-ass shoes

EDIT: INTERVIEW.de have since responded to my Facebook post and taken down the photos. However, I still take exception to them using the photos in the first place. Here’s how that conversation is developing…

Bite Club : uberlinuberlin

Bite Club

by James Glazebrook

Bite-Club-01

It’s frankly bonkers that we’ve not been to Bite Club before now. The regular street food festival combines some of our favourite things: yummy food, booze, DJs spinning disco and the company of friends and their dogs (B.Y.O.Bully), all enjoyed al fresco, on a beautiful Berlin summer evening. We headed to the Kreuzberg edition, situated among the shipping containers of Hoppetosse by Badeschiff, to sink our teeth into Bunsmobile‘s next level three-hour-braised bacon burger and Heisser Hobel‘s Käsespätzle – the most mac n’ cheesy we’ve ever had! For drinks, we sampled the best of the Singleton Whisky Bar, including the Boss Hog, a blend of Tailfire single malt, Grand Marnier, sea salted caramel, bitters and… more bacon! Topped off with an ice cream sandwich from Zwei Dicke Bären, we took one more glance at the stunning view down the Spree, before stumbling home to sleep the sleep of the contented. Make sure you don’t miss the next Bite Club!

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2 Responses to “Bite Club”

  1. Essi says:

    Wow! I just found this blog and had a blast reading all recent posts – been living in Berlin since January and finally got a bible to follow! Perfect combination of expat life and cool things worth seeing, made my day.

    Keep up the nice work :)

    Essi
    http://essinowornever.blogspot.de/

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Berlintercourse: The GIF Guide to Sex Party Etiquette – überlin

Berlintercourse: The GIF Guide to Sex Party Etiquette

by Guest Blogger

My first trip to a sex club was about five years ago. I had come to spend yet another weekend visiting a dear high school friend living in Berlin and, on a whim, we decided to go to KitKat. The bouncers let us in after first telling us to remove some of our clothes, and my friend happily obliged, keeping nothing but her panties on. I took off my dress and entered the club wearing just a jacket and my underwear.

The rest of the evening is kind of a blur, but I vividly remember enjoying the fact that we were able to dance wearing close to nothing without any creeps following us around. Which brings us to the first – and maybe most important – lesson:

Sex clubs are meant to be safe spaces, so if you visit one, please make sure you help it stay that way.

Having been a guest at several sex parties now, some at pretty tame yet fun nights like GEGEN and some more adventurous ones where almost everyone ended up getting some, I have come to realise that there are a few things you should know before getting involved. To help out my fellow sexplorers, here is what I have learned so far:

1. RESPECT THE RULES

“Alles kann, nichts muss”, as the Germans say. What this means is that the fact you are attending a sex party does not necessarily mean that you’ll end up having wild group sex on the dancefloor. Only if you feel like it and only if the party allows it. While many people probably assume that sex clubs are places where everything is allowed, this couldn’t be further from the truth.

During the sex party I attended a few months back, a significant portion of the evening was dedicated to reciting the event’s rules, and it was made very clear that whoever ignored them would be shown to the door in no time. At this particular party, voyeurism was not welcome – but this isn’t always the case, so make sure you know about the event’s specifics before you misbehave. You will usually find that information on the club’s website but don’t hesitate to reach out to the organisers via email if you have any doubts.

2. SPEAK UP

If you are attending a sex event, know that there is no place for politeness. What I mean is that if a situation is bothering you, you should not say so. I have been hesitant myself, but being straightforward is a must, so if you are afraid of making your move, ask someone to do the dirty work for you.

Once in the dark rooms of Ficken 3000, I realised that someone was watching in a very creepy way that I did not feel comfortable with. I ended up asking a friend to tell him, and the lurker was gone within a couple of seconds. As with most things in life, problems are usually solved more quickly if you deal with them directly instead of allowing them to linger on.

3. BE CONSIDERATE

Every time I engaged in or witnessed threesomes or group sex, I remember being amazed at the level of consideration couples gave to each other. Much to my surprise, I found that couples that engage in this kind of activity seem to have more balanced and healthier relationships, at least from the outside. They’re the kind of people who will outright say when they are not comfortable with a situation instead of sulking or making a scene. And the other person will take the criticism just fine.

What I learned is that, while you should obviously focus on enjoying yourself, you should always keep an eye on other people’s wellbeing. This is especially true if you decide to engage in sexual endeavours with your significant other: the experience will only be truly rewarding for you both if you make sure you are not being selfish or making your partner uncomfortable.

4. DRESS APPROPRIATELY

On a more shallow note, don’t forget that there is nothing worse than attending an event and feeling like your outfit isn’t quite right. In fact, dressing up is a great part of the fun.

Find out whether there is a dress code beforehand, don’t keep all of your clothes on if nobody else is doing so, and don’t stare at people whose sartorial choices are more daring than yours.

When in doubt, remember that this is Berlin and wear black. My go-to outfit is a black bra and black thong, but you could just wear nothing and make Germany proud.

5. DON’T JUDGE

Brace yourself for the fact that you will probably witness a few situations you never expected to. I have seen things that would normally qualify as crazy, such as grown men wearing diapers or a girl holding a knife ridiculously close to a guy’s penis and occasionally poking it.

I did a double take because I was curious, but in the end remembered that everyone has their own dark side and that other people’s should be, at most, considered with a shrug. Try to remember that sex has a lot to do with people allowing themselves to be vulnerable and allowing others into their personal space.

6. BE BOLD

Embrace the fact that this is your chance to try out new things. Most people who attend sex parties on the reg are ready to be your guide if you need them to.

Asking for advice will never be frowned upon and, just as with any regular party, people are usually open to taking new playmates under their wing. If you’re feeling unsure, just look at the way others are behaving and adjust – be emotionally intelligent and empathetic and people will welcome you with open arms.

Don’t believe me? The day after the sex party I went to, I was invited to have dinner with some of the organisers, before heading to a BDSM play party in the evening. That was the night I tried suspension bondage for the very first time, and it was quite the experience. I was incredibly glad to have more seasoned BDSMers around, as they took care of me and shared their precious advice along the way.

7. DON’T GET TOO WASTED

While it’s totally fine to be buzzed at “entry level” parties where most sexual acts happen in dark rooms or other dedicated areas, you don’t want to make a fool of yourself while other people are trying to get busy.

I did get pretty, ahem, tipsy during the first sex party I attended, and even though I mostly just ended up dancing and chatting everyone up, I regretted being that person when I woke up the next day. Oh well, it wasn’t my idea to bring all that vodka!

8. USE CONDOMS

Bring condoms with you (even if you are a girl), but also know that you will always be able to get some for free at the bar – this also applies to Berghain, by the way.

While it can be cute to wake up with a few misplaced love bites the next day because they make for good stories, you don’t want to spend it running from the pharmacy to the STD clinic. Also, nothing says “I don’t respect you” like not caring about this kind of thing. Try to remember what queen Aretha was demanding back in the sixties.

In short, have fun, be open-minded, pay attention to what is happening around you, and you will have a blast! I will soon dedicate another column to my favourite sex parties to help you choose the one on which to try out all these tips – watch this space ????

GIFs sourced by @p_a_p_i_

Berlin Moments: September 7th – September 15th – überlin

Berlin Moments: September 7th – September 15th

by Zoë Noble

Recently, I was lucky enough to try out the camera on Sony’s new Xperia Z5. They asked me to test out its low light capabilities, so I thought I’d take a midnight bike ride from Kottbusser Tor up to Warschauer Strasse. Here is a selection of the images I shot and you can see the full photo essay on the Sony blog!

Kreuzberg puddle reflection man standing among lights man standing in glowing light Berlin ubahn passing by at night Oberbaumbrucke Oberbaumbrucke at night Oberbaumbrucke view Kottbusser neon lights shot for Sony Experia Kottbusser Tor at night

Around Rügen: Exploring the Island : überlinüberlin

Around Rügen: Exploring the Island

by James Glazebrook

James and Olive in Jasmund National Park

It feels like a lifetime ago that we got back from our trip to Rügen. The highlight of our island experience may have been the Nazi ruins of Prora, but every day was like a little adventure. Olive may have been happy rolling around in the grass around our holiday home, but somehow we managed to tear ourselves away and explore Rügen to the fullest.

Jagdschloss Granitz
If there’s one thing we learned on Rügen, it’s that Germans really believe that getting there is half the fun. All of the island’s landmarks are situated a good few kilometres from the nearest car park, just so visitors can fit in a decent hike while they’re sightseeing. Jagdschloss Granitz, a pretty pink confection of a hunting castle, is fine – but the walk up, through unspoiled fields and forests, is sublime.

Cat resting in the sun Couple sitting waiting for the train Jagdschloss sign Jagdschloss forest Jagdschloss

Sassnitz
We came to the port town of Sassnitz for the Fischbrötchen – the same reason we didn’t stay long! As North Sea natives, we thought we liked fish – until we sunk our teeth into Rügen’s local delicacy. Turns out we need our seafood to have at least been kissed by a grill before it enters our mouths, but don’t let that put you off.  Get yourself to the wind-battered harbour of Sassnitz for taste of something super-fresh.

Sassnitz pier Fischbrötchen Sassnitz harbour

Sellin
The next stop on our tour of Rügen’s seaside towns took us to Sellin, worth checking out for the longest pier on the island and the old-fashioned Strandkörbe (“beach baskets”), available to rent for pooped-out visitors. When we were there, a couple were taking wedding photos running through the south beach surf. Cute!

Sellin pier

Jasmund National Park
This nature reserve on the Jasmund peninsula is Deutschland’s answer to Dover, home of the largest chalk cliffs in Germany. A peaceful hike through a beech forest brings you to Königsstühl (the King’s Chair), and a vertigo-testing climb 160m down rickety wooden stairs finds you on a rugged, undisturbed beach, with epic views out across the open sea. Unmissable.

Jasmund National Park forest

Jasmund National Park cliffs

Jasmund National Park reflection

Jasmund National Park

Boat in the ocean

Olive and James looking out at the ocean

2 Responses to “Around Rügen: Exploring the Island”

  1. Nancy says:

    Great article and beautiful, beautiful photographs! Now I want to visit Rügen even more!

  2. papaerk says:

    Wonderful article and great pictures a real pleasure to read and gives you the feeling that i want to go there as well !!!
    Well done all of you and of course Olive for providing the glamour !!!

leave a comment

About – überlin

uberlin coworking and photo studio 1

About us

We left London for Berlin in 2010, and have never looked back. Here, we found the creative freedom to follow our dreams, and the opportunity to leave our stamp on the city. We’ve benefited from the help of Berlin’s international community, and our goal is to pay this forward – by highlighting all the awesome things happening in the city, and supporting the talented people behind them. Meet the überlin family:

jamesüberlin’s wordsmith, James is a freelance writer and customer support dude. By day, he works for Basecamp, a company so passionate about remote working that they wrote a book about it, and he spends his spare time helping people move to Berlin and set up shop here.

ZoeZoë is a professional photographer and retoucher who has shot beautiful images for Harper’s Bazaar, Etsy and many more, on location across Europe and here in the überlin studio. Her latest project is When Olive Met, a blog inspired by canine companions and their stylish owners.

OliveOur little Frenchie Olive is the former Chief Happiness Officer at Factory, where she spread cheer throughout the resident startups. Berlin’s cutest office dog loves people, other pups, and is currently looking for laps to warm up. She’s also the star of When Olive Met.

überlin raw steel logo

About – überlin

uberlin coworking and photo studio 1

About us

We left London for Berlin in 2010, and have never looked back. Here, we found the creative freedom to follow our dreams, and the opportunity to leave our stamp on the city. We’ve benefited from the help of Berlin’s international community, and our goal is to pay this forward – by highlighting all the awesome things happening in the city, and supporting the talented people behind them. Meet the überlin family:

jamesüberlin’s wordsmith, James is a freelance writer and customer support dude. By day, he works for Basecamp, a company so passionate about remote working that they wrote a book about it, and he spends his spare time helping people move to Berlin and set up shop here.

ZoeZoë is a professional photographer and retoucher who has shot beautiful images for Harper’s Bazaar, Etsy and many more, on location across Europe and here in the überlin studio. Her latest project is When Olive Met, a blog inspired by canine companions and their stylish owners.

OliveOur little Frenchie Olive is the former Chief Happiness Officer at Factory, where she spread cheer throughout the resident startups. Berlin’s cutest office dog loves people, other pups, and is currently looking for laps to warm up. She’s also the star of When Olive Met.

überlin raw steel logo

25 Tourist Tricks to Rediscovering Berlin : überlinüberlin

25 Tourist Tricks to Rediscovering Berlin

by James and Zoe

Fucking tourists. Look at them – standing there in the bike lane, with a beer in each hand and a gormless grin on their face, oblivious to the bitter Berliners bearing down on them, piston legs powered by resentment and… is that… envy? They may be morons, but they seem so happy, like little children caught up in the wonderment of what is, for them, the biggest urban playground Europe has to offer.

Well, why should they have all the fun? After three years in the city, we figured we deserve a break from reality as much as any easyjetsetter. So we packed our tour guides into our “fanny packs” and set out to the city’s most obvious attractions, in order to pick up 25 tourist tricks to rediscovering Berlin.

1) Beer for breakfast. 

Beer for breakfast

2) Bratwurst for lunch.

3) Döner for dinner.

Döner for dinner

4) Speak only three words of German: “SPRECHEN. SIE. ENGLISCH?”

5) Rent the biggest bike imaginable…

Rent the biggest bike ever

6) …preferably, one powered by beer.

And make someone else pedal

7) Or go solo and rent a Segway! 

After all, no one wants to be seen with you on that thing.

8) Take the U-Bahn. 

One hour and three transfers later, you’ll have successfully made it across Unter den Linden. 

9) Get busted by BVG inspectors.

See how far you get with the line, “but I’m just a tourist…”

10) Get your photo taken with fake American soldiers…

Get your photo taken with fake American soldiers.

11) ..or THE PREDATOR?!!!

Or the Predator!!??

12) Spend all day in the Sony Center. 

There’s restaurants, a cinema AND DUNKIN’ DONUTS – why would you ever leave?
Spend all day in the Sony Center

13) Try to pay with a card. 

14) After resorting to withdrawing cash, treat your Euros like Monopoly money.

15) Start by tipping generously. 

Dead giveaway.

16) Drink a “beer” that looks like looks nuclear waste.  

17) Glühwein: Christmas in a cup.  

Drink Gluhwein

18) Queue.

For Burgermeister. For Berghain. For the bloody Reichstag.

19) Get knocked back from Berghain. Never understand why. 

20) Be disappointed by the Berlin Wall. 

IMG_4368-650px

21) Marvel at street art as if it was the Sistine Chapel.

Like no one ever drew on a wall where you come from… 

Marvel at street art as if it was the Sistine Chapel.

22) Act like a tit and treat the Memorial for the Murdered Jews of Europe like a jungle gym. 

 Treat the Memorial for the Murdered Jews of Europe like a jungle gym

23) Follow the crowd. It’s going to Mauerpark.

24) Take this selfie.

Take this selfie

25) And finally… PHOTOAUTOMAT!

photautomat

33 Responses to “25 Tourist Tricks to Rediscovering Berlin”

  1. Deutschland says:

    …very bad taste, guys! sooooo sorry…:-/

  2. Victoria says:

    Hilarious!
    Alright, I’ve got a few for you:

    1. Block the bottom of the stairs at Friedrichstraße, Alexanderplatz or Hauptbahnhof ‘cos you and your group don’t know where you’re going!

    2. Actually walk up, on the left hand-side on the escalators. Real Berliners stand in the middle of the escalator and block others from passing on.

    3. Vomit all over the floor at Eberswalderstrasse!

  3. RadiantFlux says:

    I remember a East German colleague who was dating a South German being excited when he went to visit her parents for the first time down south. To blend in he ordered a large white beer for breakfast (to fit in with the white sausages etc) and then realized belatedly that his soon to be parents-in-law were sipping coffees and looking at him in horror.

  4. herr james says:

    1. ok, while it might make your hands look huge, that bier is nowhere NEAR a decent breakfast– MINDESTENS .5L augustiner! but kudos for not dropping the m-bomb, all the same.
    2. love that even the predator, THE PREDATOR wears a bumbag. snortle.

  5. Sophia says:

    BEST POST EVER! I laughed my ass off reading this. <3

  6. Ivy Lee says:

    Funny. I never thought I’d say or feel this, but I almost have a repulsion of going to B. after all the hype. :D

  7. Mn. Warn says:

    Or; …move to Berlin for 3 years as a “…freelance writer, social media analyst & a photographer…” (wow, who could have guessed?), and write ironically about other people visiting, convincing the world ”Ja, we are über Berliners!”. That is so cool.

    But as you’ve already mentioned, also a “dead giveaway”.

    // Mn,

  8. papaerk says:

    Love it well done a brilliant piece …

  9. […] It can be totally liberating to rediscover where you live. Berlin is big and there’s still a lot more to see here. […]

  10. Lydia Goolia says:

    “Act like a tit”… ha!

  11. Bonnie says:

    well, I guess if YOUR family was murdered at the holocaust, you wouldn’t treat this subject with such cluelessness… it’s distasteful, sorry.

    • James Glazebrook says:

      That’s our point exactly.

      We HATE those people who use the Memorial as a playground, because it shows massive disrespect and a lack of interest in what the memorial represents.

      Sorry if we accidentally offended you, but we agree with you: people who don’t show the proper respect to the victims of the Holocaust are THE WORST.

  12. Nina says:

    Haha, you had me at “easyjetsetter” anyway, but I love this post. Every year I grab a couple of friends and do the Bus 100 Hop on Hop Off Trip and pretend I was a tourist. So much fun. It always happens to me that people at Lustgarten come to me and say “Excuse me, you are obviously only visiting, but if you want to go back home with your money and camera, you better watch your bag!” <3

  13. nz says:

    go to berghain?

  14. Sandra says:

    So great! I will try and rediscover my city very soon. :D

    I especially like James’ face standing in front of the Berlin Wall. Haha…

    And actually that man doing a handstand..jeez…. I remember when I was about 6 yrs old and we went there with class, we were told NEVER EVER to sit on the stones or else!!!

    oh and one question… is there already Glühwein at Alexanderplatz? Why wasn’t I told +_+ ….

    • James Glazebrook says:

      God bless your teacher, for teaching you better than most tourists!

      You can get Glühwein at that poxy Oase at Alex, they have an outdoor hut selling the good stuff :)

  15. Maj says:

    BEST. POST. EVER!

  16. ebe says:

    I love that so many of these tips have to be with alcohol and street food. No wonder Berlin is my kinda place…

  17. David says:

    Although not from Berlin, this has tickled me as on our many visits we cannot work out why people visit and do such things as 5, 6, 7 and of course 22! Photoautomat is our guilty pleasure every time though! Great site btw!

  18. Clairikine says:

    The best.

    My brother’s favorite experience of Berlin was shimmying up the blocks at the Jewish Memorial and getting called down by a security guard (“Hallo!!!!’”). It was second only to the time he got caught on the U-Bahn without a valid ticket twice in one hour – by the same BVG employee.

  19. ashley says:

    this is amazing. as is your TV tower selfie :) I miss sweet Olive!!

  20. Vanessa says:

    Perfect! I think I may have to reclaim Berlin as well :)

    Although I tried pretending to be a tourist when I forgot to get a BVG ticket and it didn’t work at all. They said if I don’t have an address here I have to pay in cash now or they’ll take me to the police. Yikes!

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