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Category Archives: music

Win a pair of tickets to The Dillinger Escape Plan m/ – überlin

Win a pair of tickets to The Dillinger Escape Plan m/

by James Glazebrook

@benweinman on instagram

@benweinman on instagram

[EDIT: this competition is now closed. Click here to see if we’re running any open competitions]

WTF. The Dillinger Escape Plan have to be the maddest band on the planet. Have a look at their craziest moments, and scroll down to find how to win 2 tickets to see them test Postbahnhof’s fire codes next Sunday, August 16th.

HOW TO WIN 2 X TICKETS FOR THE DILLINGER ESCAPE PLAN AT POSTBAHNHOF ON 16TH AUGUST:

Want to headwalk your way to Postbahnof next Sunday? Just answer this question in the comments below:

What’s the craziest concert you’ve ever been to?

You have until 6pm on Friday 7th August. Good luck!

The Boring Bit (yawn, RULES):

1. You must be at least 18 years old to enter.
2. ONE ENTRY PER PERSON!
3. We will keep a record of each comment in a database and then a random number generator picks the winner.
4. Remember to include your full (real) name and email address or we won’t be able to put you on the guestlist!
5. We will notify the winners via email.

7 Responses to “Win a pair of tickets to The Dillinger Escape Plan m/”

  1. Max Rogall says:

    JR Ewing, august 2006 @ Magnet Club Berlin
    Nothing to add.

  2. i have been to a few crazy concerts but the craziest one would be when Kyuss got back together in 2010 at Hellfest.

    i knew that Mondo Generator, Brant Bjork and John Garcia were playing in the same festival, in the same day and i remember talking to a few friends about how cool it would be if they got back together and played some tunes.

    so… every band plays their set without mentioning or playing anything from Kyuss. the last band to get onstage in John Garcia and he plays some Kyuss songs for a while until he decides to talk to the crowd and mentions Kyuss.

    He says that he saw Nick Olivieri and Brant Bjork playing before and that he would like to bring them onstage and play some Kyuss songs for the crowd. Before they got onstage, he mentions something like “… and Kyuss is back.” and they play Green Machine.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FsD_AqABYIw

    this is the shitty video i did from that song.

  3. Sara Neidorf says:

    The craziest show I’ve ever been to was in a packed basement in the Beaumont Warehouse in West Philly with Stinking Lizaveta.

  4. Franziska says:

    The Swell Season @ Admiralspalast. Not a big fan of this kind of music … but the audience was the craziest I ever saw / heard. The sang every song perfectly. All choir parts and most difficult parts. The whole room was like a professional choir. Nobody could believe this … the band nor the audience. It was like a rush ????

  5. Eduardo Mattos says:

    It was christeene last sunday

  6. Bernd Bauer says:

    Dwarves in Berlin ’05 were utter insanity.

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Win guestlist to Peaches, Ellen Allien and more at SchwuZ! – überlin

Win guestlist to Peaches, Ellen Allien and more at SchwuZ!

by James Glazebrook

Peaches by Alexa Vachon

[EDIT: this competition is now closed. Click here to see if we’re running any open competitions]

OUTRAGEOUS LINEUP ALERT! This Friday, Peaches is joined by Ellen Allien, Aerea Negrot and many more awesome artists at SchwuZ. This utter treat of a club night is the 100th edition of London Calling vs. Expatriarch Generations, with a special performance by Ziur AKA Mika Risiko of CRIME fame.

Peaches hand picked Risiko for this showcase as part of the Expatriarch Generations project, which hooks up emerging artists with established acts for personal mentoring, support and career advice. Each month, Berlin Community Radio airs a conversation between the two, like this fascinating discussion between Sasha Perrera (Jahcoozi) and Bella Cuts. We can’t wait to hear the Peaches edition! Or see her live!! Scroll down to win!!!

HOW TO WIN 2 X TICKETS FOR LONDON CALLING VS. EXPATRIARCH GENERATIONS AT SCHWUZ ON FRIDAY OCTOBER 3RD (full event details):

Just leave us a comment below with the answer to this easy question:

(apart from Peaches and Ellen Allien) Who is the fiercest female ever to make music in Berlin?

You have until midnight on Thursday 2nd October to enter. GOOD LUCK!

The Boring Bit (yawn, RULES):

1. You must be 18 years or older to enter.
2. ONE ENTRY PER PERSON!
3. We will keep a record of each comment in a database and then a random number generator picks the winner.
4. Remember to include your full (real) name and email address, so we can contact you if you win.
6. We will notify the winner via email on Friday 3rd October.

14 Responses to “Win guestlist to Peaches, Ellen Allien and more at SchwuZ!”

  1. claude eigan says:

    Planningtorock

  2. Alizee Lenox says:

    Planningtorock.

  3. Maria Cukor says:

    Planningtorock! <3 <3 <3

  4. Jan Durina says:

    PLANNINGTOROCK!!!

  5. Nathalie Dittombé says:

    Luci van Org :)

  6. Sot says:

    Nina Hagen

  7. Camille says:

    Nina Hagen!

  8. Eltjon RRAMILLI says:

    Gabriele Susanne Kerner: stage name ”Nena”

  9. roel geijn says:

    Nina hagen natuurlijk!

  10. Luca Miehe says:

    Nina Kravitz

  11. Jan-Philipp Vatthauer says:

    Sookee

  12. Luca Miehe says:

    Tama Sumo!!!

leave a comment

Win 2 x 2 tickets to Between the Buried and Me! – überlin

Win 2 x 2 tickets to Between the Buried and Me!

by James Glazebrook

Between the Buried and Me Coma Ecliptic

[EDIT: this competition is now closed. Click here to see if we’re running any open competitions]

B-bands are smashing it in metal at the moment! We’ve just been raving about Bring Me The Horizon, but Between the Buried and Me may have pipped them for our album of the year so far. Like BMTH, BTBAM are pushing metalcore into new, exciting directions, albeit down the weirder progressive, concept-album path towards full-blown rock opera. Check out the video for “The Coma Machine” to find out what the frig that sounds like in 2015, and scroll down to win a pair of tickets to the band’s upcoming Berlin show!

HOW TO WIN 2 X TICKETS FOR THE BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME AT MUSIK & FRIEDEN ON 29TH SEPTEMBER:

Do you and a friend want to get your prog on at Musik & Frieden (formerly Magnet) next Tuesday? Just answer this question in the comments below:

What’s your pick for album of the year so far (in any genre)?

You have until 6pm on Friday 25th September. Good luck!

The Boring Bit (yawn, RULES):

1. You must be at least 18 years old to enter.
2. ONE ENTRY PER PERSON!
3. We will keep a record of each comment in a database and then a random number generator picks the winner.
4. Remember to include your full (real) name and email address or we won’t be able to put you on the guestlist!
5. We will notify the winners via email.

7 Responses to “Win 2 x 2 tickets to Between the Buried and Me!”

  1. Sara Neidorf says:

    Pale Communion by Opeth

  2. Joao says:

    Chelsea Wolfe – Abyss

  3. Ana says:

    The Vaccines – English Graffiti

  4. Andy says:

    Mac Demarco – Another One

  5. Untitled by The Armed

  6. Wilson Fisk says:

    Stray from the Path – Subliminal Criminals

leave a comment

What I Know About Germans – The Book!überlin

What I Know About Germans – The Book!

by James Glazebrook

It’s finally here! We’re very proud and über-excited to announce that our first book, What I Know About Germans: 101 Observations, is out to buy today.

What I Know About Germans is based on our insanely popular blog post of the same name, which generated over 40,000 Facebook Likes, 600 blog comments, coverage by the likes of Bild and Financial Times Deutschland – and enough traffic to crash our servers on more than one occasion! A lovingly compiled collection of an Australian writer’s hilarious observations about her adopted beloved countrymen, What I Know About Germans has been brought to life as a beautiful book, available in both print and eBook versions.

Want to see what we’re so excited about? Take a peek inside…

What I Know About Germans: 101 Observations has been a year in the making, and is the result of a lot of hard work from a small but dedicated team. We’re indebted to author Liv Hambrett in particular for allowing us to publish her post in the first place, for writing new and improved observations for the book, and for being the unofficial WIKAG cheerleader while we pull it all together. I’d also like to thank Josh Bauman, whose awesome illustrations really bring Liv’s words to life, Eric for producing our impressive What I Know About Germans web page, Sharmaine, Evi and the epubli team for their help and support – and of course Zoë for beautifying everything with her boundless design talent! Group hug :D

Anyway, enough of my gabbing. To find out more about the book, and to pick up a copy, visit the What I Know About Germans: 101 Observations page now!

8 Responses to “What I Know About Germans – The Book!”

  1. […] for more. And in the meantime this has actually become a reality: The released their first book. What I know about Germans is a compilation of over 101 tongue-in-cheek observation about Germans and their quirky habits […]

  2. kelly ann says:

    jUST PURCHASED YOUR BOOK :) THINK YOU HAVE A NEW FAN .. BERLIN HERE I COME

  3. Job says:

    This will defenitely be on my christmas wishlist :)

  4. […] And the book came out. Look at it. It is bloody fantastic. […]

  5. Katie says:

    WTF you guys! This is amazing!! xxx

  6. Awesome job, all! Looking forward to buying myself a copy (or two..)!

  7. Federico says:

    Hahah The cover is amazing already!

leave a comment

überlin on the radio #2! The Valentine's Day Massacre : uberlinuberlin

überlin on the radio #2! The Valentine’s Day Massacre

by James Glazebrook

OK, so it’s actually St. Valentine’s Eve, but we thought we’d lubricate your ears in anticipation of the schmaltziest day of the year. On Monday, Adrian of Post Flashback was kind/stupid enough to let me back into the Berlin Community Radio studio, along with my goodwyfe Zoë – to talk about love, heartbreak, bad dates and other relationship awkwardness. You’ll have to strain to hear us speak (technical difficulties!), but we’ve decided that’s a good thing. Instead, listen in for a selection of our favourite breakup/make up tracks, including The Cure, The Postal Service and Deftones.

Or if you’re on Spotify, you can listen to our playlist minus the shit-talking, plus a few surprise bonus tracks – just click here! And tune into Berlin Community Radio every Monday at 6pm (Berlin time), for nostalgic indie, shoegaze, post punk, post hardcore and other sad dad music. Check out Post Flashback on Facebook for more deets.

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2 Responses to “überlin on the radio #2! The Valentine’s Day Massacre”

  1. Federico says:

    This was lovely! The only thing that puzzled me was the “clear-your-pipes-before-a-date” tip.

    If I had followed that advice I would have probably not bothered stepping out of the house, ending up having delusional relashionships with pizza delivery guys and marrying a pillow shaped like my favourite anime character!

leave a comment

überlin Coworking – End of an Era – überlin

überlin Coworking – End of an Era

by James Glazebrook

We have some sad news – in about a month’s time, we are going close the doors on the überlin coworking space. Our landlord has decided to sell off the building, including the beautiful space that’s been our shared office, photo studio and workshop/party space for nearly two years. We’ve given a lot of thought to starting again in another space, but with demanding day jobs that we love, we know we can’t spare the time and attention another coworking business would need to thrive.

We’re super-grateful for everything we got out of this experience while it lasted. We’ve learned a lot, met a lot of great people, had some great times, and seen them produce a lot of great work. And we’ve benefitted from the help, skills and support of a lovely bunch of people, including family and friends, old and new. We’ve said specific thankyous before, and always missed out people, so let’s just say that you know who you are. If you were at all involved in helping to create the space, make it a success, or keeping us sane while we struggled with the extra work we’d given ourselves, then we will always be grateful. There’d be no überlin without ü! *sniff*

PS this means that Zoë is on the hunt for somewhere to shoot. If you have any leads on commercial spaces, or shared photo studios, drop her an email. Thanks!

Thai & Techno – Spring Edition : überlinüberlin

Thai & Techno – Spring Edition

by James Glazebrook

Thai and Techno - Massaman curry

I can’t believe I’m going to miss this! For some reason, the (actual) geniuses behind Thai & Techno have decided to save their spring edition for the one week I’m out of town. However, they did take pity on me, and invited us to a preview of their fusion of delicious food and crispy beats, for a taste of what I’m missing.

And what a taste! We enjoyed pad thai spring rolls, the best Massaman curry we’ve had in ages, and an intriguing dessert of black rice and banana. The perfect boozy accompaniment came in the form of Redwood bar’s Rad Thai cocktail, a potent blend of vodka, shredded carrot, lime, chilli and coriander. Lush!

To enjoy all this, and a soundtrack from slow hypnotic sounds to dancefloor techno, make sure you’re at FluxBau on Friday March 27th, from 6pm til late. Scroll down for a short video from the inaugural Thai & Techno, and get full details of the big night here.

Thai and Techno - pad Thai rolls with tamarind dipping saunce

Thai and Techno - black rice pudding

Thai and Techno - Rad Thai cocktail

Thai & Techno from Opal Collective on Vimeo.

Portrait: Recyclemented – überlin

Portrait: Recyclemented

by Guest Blogger

jacquie and clement standing against rusty backdrop

by Emma Robertson

For Clement Jeannesson and Jacquie Kappl, furniture construction is a labour of love. Their design company, Recyclemented, is less than a year old; although in many ways it’s still a hobby, the pair is working tirelessly to build it up into a fully-fledged career, one palette at a time. Using found wood, discarded materials and (especially) old EuroPalettes, Clement and Jacquie are giving new life to Berlin’s forsaken and forgotten: the result is strikingly unique furniture, each with its own twist on the traditional.

Clement and Jacquie, originally from France and Germany respectively, started Recyclemented in Melbourne, Australia. “We moved to the Gold Coast and we were pretty poor at the time,” Jacquie explains. “We had an apartment but we had no furniture, so we started building stuff out of bits and pieces we found on the side of the road. At some point, we had like seven tables in our place!”

It’s become something of a Cinderella story since they relocated to Berlin at the beginning of this year; although Clement has a history in mechanics and steelwork, both are self-taught woodworkers, picking up the tricks of the trade through YouTube videos, online tutorials, and good old trial-and-error. We caught up with Clement and Jacquie at their studio in Lichtenberg to talk upcycling, working in Berlin, and how passion drives creativity.

recyclemented banner

What is more important as a designer, form or function?

Clement Jeannesson: Function, for sure! Function is better because if you make a chair that looks beautiful but you can’t sit on it, what’s the point?

Jacquie Kappl: He always lectures me on that one! (Laughs) I have all these ideas, “We have to do this! We can make it like that!” but then Clement comes in, “Nope. It’s not sehr gut.” (Laughs)

CJ: Well, it has to be useful! What are you going to do with it? We’re selling furniture first. It’s an art piece in the end — it’s beautiful, sure, but it’s furniture. It has to serve its purpose. It can be a nice table but it has to work.

JK: I have a lot of ideas. I’m the dreamer of the two of us. For Clement, it’s more about actually putting the ideas to paper.

working on different elements

Where do you come up with your best ideas?

CJ: For me it’s non-stop! Everywhere I go! It’s 24/7 for me. When I’m at work, I get ideas and I can just take them and run with it. I’m a bit obsessed with being creative, trying to come up with more ideas, more and more and more, and then — the best part — actually turning them into something.

JK: Clement is teaching me to come up with my ideas before I come to work, to bring them to the shop and then work on them here instead of wasting time sitting around thinking. It actually really is helpful because at the start, I wasn’t doing that. I’d just come in, sit here, turn around the wood, thinking, looking at everything…

CJ: We don’t have a lot of materials so that affects us creatively. We’re never going to do 12 of the same table, for example, because I’m never going to be able to find 12 of the same kind of wood! So, every time it’s a bit of a challenge because you have to make it work with what you’ve got. But the more we do it, the easier it gets. It’s never boring.

closeup of ruler

Do you ever get tired of that challenge, though?

JK: I don’t know. It’s extra challenging and at the same time, it isn’t. It appeals to a customer that wants something unique. But at the end of the day, there’s a style they’re asking for so you can’t always give them exactly that because you’re tied to the types of wood you find…

CJ: It’s also difficult because you don’t want to do something too unique every time.

It’s a fine balance, I guess. If people wanted cookie-cutter furniture, they’d go to IKEA.

JK: Exactly. Plus, in terms of what we’re doing, we don’t have a lot of competition at the moment. If there’s anyone else doing recycled material furniture with our same style, we haven’t heard of it.

Is it necessary to push boundaries like that when you’re working in a field that is so traditional?

CJ: I have to say, this job has been here forever! Before steel, before everything, woodworking was always here. So, yes, if you don’t do something a little bit different, you don’t exist.

JK: Especially in Berlin where there are so many artists, it’s not just doing something different, but doing something good. You have to be amazing. More than exceptional. People have to recognise you, you have to have a signature where people can see, Oh, this is Recyclemented. It’s good because it challenges us. We like a challenge. It’s on, IKEA!

stacked wood

Where do you find the wood you use? This part of Lichtenberg seems like it would be a good place to find discarded wood. Do you go on missions to find material?

CJ: Not really. It’s just become a natural part of our day-to-day life. If we see something, we stop and pick it up.

JK: We’ve got a big truck! (Laughs) We do buy some materials though, the products that give the finishing touches and hardware that will make the furniture last longer. We want to provide a high quality piece. The idea is to sell products that are quality — that’s really important.

CJ: Like you said, in this area near our studio space, there’s always a lot of scraps and pieces that would go to waste normally. There are a lot of businesses here, a lot of construction areas that produce a lot of waste.

Would your work have as much personality if you were using wood that was brand new?

JK: Well, it wouldn’t be the same fun, that’s for sure. It would definitely lose a lot of the personality if we bought the wood. It wouldn’t be Recyclemented.

CJ: We love this concept, using old to make new. Everything comes from everything, for us. It’s part of the adventure and an important part of the end product. We’ll name the piece after the street corner where we found the palette. (Laughs) You know exactly where it comes from that way. Better than going to IKEA and you have no idea where it comes from.

JK: This was a good initiative for us at the start because we didn’t have money to buy furniture. This was a great way for us to be able to have the things we need and create this new lifestyle for ourselves.

working together

Would you say that Berlin is the right city for this kind of design? Are people responsive to your style?

JK: This whole “upcycling” trend is going really well in Berlin, so yes, people are very responsive to what we make. People are becoming more and more conscious in a way, of living and of the environment. There’s definitely a market for it. You just need to find your spot there, and have a voice. That’s what we’re working on.

Was that eco-friendly nature of Recyclemented something that’s always been important to you?

JK: In the beginning, it was more important to me than to Clement. I’m the hippie in this relationship! (Laughs) But he’s the one who actually got into the knowledge behind it! Certain palettes for example, are treated with toxins. You know how eggs have a serial number to show which is free-range, which is factory farmed and stuff? It’s the same with palettes, they’re stamped in the same way for which ones are treated and which are not. We need to know this stuff because people put our furniture in their living spaces.

Wow, I didn’t know that.

JK: You have to be careful, and not everyone is. I don’t know if it’s a money issue here in Berlin that the eco-friendly thing hasn’t picked up as much, but in Australia, it’s huge already. I think it can only grow from here! We see more and more the effects of what’s happening if we don’t take care of the planet, you know? It sounds cheesy but we have to be behind that if we want to keep this planet together. Small things make a difference!

painting wood closeup

Do you worry that furniture from recycled material will go out of style?

JK: No. It’s still pretty new in Berlin, it’s only starting to become a big trend. I think we’re starting at the right moment. The downside is that because the palettes are becoming trendy… You’ve seen it in front of cafés, they make this simple bench out of bottle crates and a piece of wood, right? They call that recycled or upcycled furniture. And that makes it hard for us, because when people hear about our stuff, they have that pre-existing notion of it as this pile of junk on the sidewalk.

CJ: We do use the palette as the first material but, in the end, it doesn’t look like a palette! That’s the whole point!

closeup of clement

Even with your unique style, would you say there’s a lot of competition? I always see homeware and furniture out at the markets and stuff…

JK: It depends on what kind of markets you go to. There are the design markets, where the people are coming specifically to buy furniture and big pieces for the home… But then there’s Mauerpark where the tourists go, so they don’t buy furniture, obviously.

CJ: They just want to have a look and have a stroll on a Sunday, which is nice — we like to do that too. A lot of people at the markets want to go for a bargain, they want stuff really cheap because they can get it for those prices at Mauer. That’s not such a good location for us.

JK: Five euro for a handmade shelf? (Laughs) Get out!

CJ: They all want vintage! It’s big in Berlin, so everyone wants the vintage at flea markets like Mauerpark… We’re not fans of it at all! Sometimes it’s just old junk that’s labelled vintage, and because it’s so trendy, people really look for it at the flea markets. But at the design markets and some of the other pop-ups, people love to pass by our stall and look at the furniture, take photos and stuff.

soldering in workshop

I love going to the markets, but I never buy furniture there because I have no way of getting it home!

JK: Exactly, we get a lot of requests because of that. People who come by bike or on the Bahn, they have no way to transport a table back to their flat.

CJ: It’s been a good learning experience. The first markets we did, we brought all the big tables and the big shelves but eventually we started to build a few smaller pieces, accessories, and things like the triangle shelves that are easier to transport.

It seems like this has all been a good learning experience for you.

CJ: Of course. We start from scratch with the wood. No one has taught us these techniques, we learn everything from trying, from doing. There’s a lot of pieces and I’m getting prouder and prouder of what I’m doing. We can see ourselves improving, and that’s a good sign I think.

Follow Recyclemented on Facebook and Instagram, and check out their designs on their website.Use the offer code “Überlin” when you contact them to get 10% off! (offer good through to the end of 2015).

finished recyclemented piece of furniture

Portrait: Pauline Hoch, Our/Berlin – überlin

Portrait: Pauline Hoch, Our/Berlin

by Guest Blogger

20150916-zoenoble-7788-1

by Emma Robertson

“Is it too early to start drinking?” I ask upon arrival at the Our/Berlin vodka distillery in Treptow. Luckily, Pauline Hoch, one-half of Paul Sanders, the marketing agency at the helm of Our/Berlin, doesn’t think so. Laughing, she fixes me a drink: their new tea-infused vodka, a splash of tonic, ice and a tendril of orange peel. “We were on an inspirational weekend with the team at a house in the countryside when the homeowner suggested we infuse the vodka with tea,” Pauline explains, “It was genius. Then a local tea company called Paper & Tea got in touch with us unexpectedly, and we were able to collaborate. It was an effortless partnership.” Such seems to be the way with Our/Berlin vodka: they emphasise not only a sense of local camaraderie and community, but a simple, homegrown aesthetic that is the very essence of their brand.

Our/Vodka got its start in Stockholm in 2013 when a group working with Pernod Ricard came up with the idea for a global brand with local roots. After looking in the nightclub and gastronomy industry in Berlin, the team met with the Paul Sanders Agency (run by Pauline and her partner Jon Sanders). The first of many effortless partnerships, I guess. With Berlin as its flagship city, the brand has since taken on Detroit, Amsterdam, London, and Seattle as its adoptive homes. Here, the brand has evolved from more than just a simple vodka manufacturer: the team hosts infusion workshops, dinner parties, cooking classes, art exhibitions, and happy hours. After a quick tour of the distillery’s facilities, I sat down with Pauline to talk simplicity, science, space, and of course, vodka.

20150916-zoenoble-7594-2

With wine, there is a very distinct process for evaluating and tasting. Is there a proper way to drink vodka?

Of course the Russians would say you have to drink a lot. (Laughs) Especially when you eat! I think our cultural standards are a little different here in Germany. We try to tell our customers that they should try the vodka pure and at room temperature so they can really appreciate the quality. Of course, it’s also okay to just mix it with a soft drink, Mineralwasser, or tonic. You don’t have to be an experienced bartender to make a nice drink!

And how do you drink it?

In summer, I like a strawberry margarita with vodka. But in the winter, we collaborate with Berliner Winter to make a kind of hot vodka drink with apple cider. It’s similar to a grog, and very delicious. I also really like it after dinner as a digestif, kind of like a grappa… But like I said, drinking it pure is the best way to appreciate it.

The taste is very subtle, which I think is rare for vodka.

Exactly — it’s very mild. I think vodka has a bad reputation because people think of the taste in a certain way…. Our/Vodka is not overpowering, there’s no real “flavour,” so to speak. Some people say it’s a bit lavender-ish, some say there’s a hint of lemon, but there’s nothing that we add in. We use German-local ingredients and purified Berlin Leitungswasser, so the recipe is really as simple as the concept itself. It’s funny because I have a lot of girlfriends that aren’t into drinking vodka, but they drink this vodka because it’s so smooth.

20150916-zoenoble-7720-3

Can you explain the science behind the distilling process? What exactly happens behind closed doors here?

I’ll give you the simplified version: here in the factory, we distill the aromatic fraction that gives the flavour to Our/Vodka. This is then blended together with wheat-based ethanol, which we import from Münster, and purified Leitungswasser. When we were initially sourcing our ethanol, we found that the quality here in Berlin and Brandenburg was too poor, so we ended up importing from Münster, which is working very well for us.

But otherwise, the Our/Vodka aesthetic is very local.

Definitely. We love the sense of community here in Berlin, but we’re also expanding the “global” part of the brand as well. We were the testers, the guinea pigs, the trial. And now, they opened up Our/Detroit and Our/Seattle, and Our/Amsterdam will be opening in October. The global aspect is coming more and more together, which is super nice because we were always feeling a little alone over here — we were the first European city for Our/Vodka, so we’re very much looking forward to having our sibling opening up in Europe.

20150916-zoenoble-7754-4

Is there a strong connection between all of the headquarters, or do you operate exclusively?

We definitely have a strong exchange with the teams all over the world. We have an internal communication tool, we talk about everything, we swap ideas, we review new materials together… We’ve actually become close friends with the team in Detroit. We really got to know them well, we’ve spent holidays over there and they showed us around the city!

I love Detroit so much. There’s such a huge sense of community over there… It reminds me a lot of Berlin, actually.

I think so too! There’s a lot of common ground between Detroit and Berlin. The decision to open up there was a huge one. People were like, “What?! Why Detroit?!” It seemed crazy that we would set up there because the economy is so bad but it’s working out so well. If you are actually the one to start something and develop it, you inspire the community and you can create something amazing.

20150916-zoenoble-7670-5

Why do you think Berlin was chosen to be the flagship city for Our/Vodka?

Berlin was the perfect choice for the first city because it’s still so young. It’s vibrant. We also have such a big nightclub and bar scene here…. The city is so attractive for a lot of people! This is where trends are set! I think there’s a preconception that everything that comes out of Berlin is cool. (Laughs)

Our/Vodka has set up shop in Berlin, Detroit, Seattle, London, Amsterdam… What’s the common denominator in all these cities?

I’ve asked the same question! It’s most important that the city is young in terms of its established markets… For example, they didn’t want to go to Portland: they went to Seattle instead. That’s not so obvious a choice but we did that because in Portland, there’s already a strong local community with a local brewery and distillery. It’s easier to cultivate this sense of community when you start it from the ground up. People are very open to new products in these cities — it’s very inspiring.

And what made you decide to open the distillery here in Treptow?

It was admittedly very hard to find the right space. It’s especially hard within the confines of the city because there’s a lot of building code requirements… But we found this place and we love it. It’s still in the city but it’s kind of isolated as well. We have a very vibrant surrounding here, there’s Club der Visionäre and the Badeschiff and White Trash and Arena Club all just around the corner. We’re very lucky.

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You mentioned these building code requirements. What kind of restrictions are there?

Have you ever seen a distillery explode? (Laughs) It basically just leaves a big hole in the ground. If the distillery explodes here, the entire area would be wiped out. It would look like Mars. (Laughs) So, we have to be very careful. In New York, they were fighting so hard to get the proper permits, they wanted to open the distillery actually within Manhattan — which they succeeded at, by the way; Our/New York will be the first distillery in Manhattan since prohibition times! So, yes, we’re very happy here, and lucky to be here.

I read that you guys brought on an engineer to customise the space as well.

Exactly. And there were a lot of rules. Of course — we’re in Germany! As it was the first distillery for the Our/Vodka project, it has to be made very properly. The laws are very strict! (Laughs) We had to keep in mind that we needed an area to host events, but also a working office space, and a storage space for the dry goods that we use for packaging and bottling and labels and that kind of thing. The best part is this nice roll gate that you can pull up in the summertime, there’s a nice breeze and so much natural light.

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That’s so nice because, for me, space really affects my creativity.

Absolutely. When we have the doors wide open in the summer, there’s no boundary between customers, visitors, and us. It also helps creativity flow, helps us find new ideas… Because it’s so open, you can move around, you can go outside when you get sick of sitting in front of the computer… This area is so full of creative people, too. We spend almost more time chatting with our amazing neighbours than we do inside working! (Laughs)

It definitely doesn’t feel like your typical office here.

It was important for us to have a space where people and also our team feel comfortable. It’s a vodka distillery, but it shouldn’t have the feeling of an office. We want to be very open. We want a space where people feel they can just drop by and have a drink. We want people to be comfortable here. That’s what we’re trying to achieve. Just like we have the name on the bottle, we really want to make this Our Berlin.

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Music Montag: Young Legionnaire : überlinüberlin

Music Montag: Young Legionnaire

by James Glazebrook

Young Legionnaire photographed by Danny North - http://www.dannynorth.co.uk/portfolio/

Young Legionnaire photographed by Danny North

Young Legionnaire are back! Something of a supergroup from the UK’s post-post punk scene, YL consists of Bloc Party’s Gordon Moakes, drummer Dean Pearson and frontman Paul Mullen, formerly of yourcodenameis:milo (one of our few sources of North East pride), and now the leader of the brilliant Berlin-based-ish electro rockers Losers. Young Legionnaire are writing news songs (yay!) and will be threatening to blow Idlewild off the stage at Lido this Sunday, March 1st. Come get some.

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Music Montag: WILDE – überlin

Music Montag: WILDE

by James Glazebrook

WILDE

Such feels. Part-time Berliner Giselle Mapp has been splitting her time between here and her hometown of Toronto for two years now. Back in Canada, she works on crystalline productions with the remainder of WILDE, Brandon Merenick and Olutobi “Nyra” Akinwumi, while she spends her time in Berlin seemingly collecting experiences and, yes, more feels. At the risk of projecting, we can hear the self-reflection imposed by time spent abroad in Mapp’s introspective lyrics:

When I wrote this song, I was going through a lot of feelings, and emotions about who I was, where I am going. There were so many colours and shades of myself layering each other. So I wanted to be reminded, and when I was I felt sure again. I felt the best part of myself that kept me going, coming back, ready to help and love the rest of me. You’ll find the best part of yourself flashing by you, and in an instant, it’s gone again. But it will be there, and it will always come back. Like a whisper in the ear, you’ll remember it, like soft words.

Submerge yourself in “Flashlight”, and go to WILDE’s website for updates on the forthcoming EP, which includes remixes by Nick Catchdubs and Esta of Soulection. Should be deep.

Music Montag: Radio Friendly Unit Shifters – überlin

Music Montag: Radio Friendly Unit Shifters

by James Glazebrook

Nick Catchdubs by Ian Meyer

Nick Catchdubs by Ian Meyer

Music Montag bonus beats WHAT? While burning CDs for Feeling Gloomy Berlin’s 2nd Birthday Party this Friday, I discovered that my favourite mixtape is actually a SERIES of mixtapes. Nick Catchdubs and Mr Drucker’s “Radio Friendly Unit Shifter” cuts up classic grunge (Nirvana, Temple of the Dog), Tarantino movie samples (“dick dick dick dick dick dick dick”), one-hit wonders (“Detachable Penis”!), live hip hop (Cypress Hill at Woodstock ’94, A Tribe Called Quest at Free Tibet) and that most 90s phenomenon, the hidden track. And the best thing about it? It’s just one of FOUR slacktastic alternarock compilations!

Why am I telling you all this? Well, because I’m planning a set just like this (although mixed more poorly) at Feeling Gloomy Berlin’s 2nd Birthday Party at Roter Salon in Volksbühne. Expect 90s grunge, indie, Britpop and assorted miserabilia. If you have any requests, pop them in the comments below and I’ll see what I can do ????

4 Responses to “Music Montag: Radio Friendly Unit Shifters”

  1. Papaerk says:

    what happened to that urban thing guys?

  2. Wilson says:

    Can we have some Rage Against The Machine please?

    ‘Killing in the name’ to be precise!

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Music Montag: Oum Shatt : uberlinuberlin

Music Montag: Oum Shatt

by James Glazebrook

Oum Shatt. Photo by www.joekake.com

Photo by www.joekake.com

Oum Shatt are weird. I mean, just look at them. And that name – is it short for “oh, um, I shat myself”? Not that I’m complaining, because a touch of oddness usually helps when it comes to creating weird and wonderful music. Especially if you’re a German trio experimenting with minimal rock n’ roll sprinkled with Arabic influences.

We like the Berlin band’s own description best: “A bit of Ricky Nelson with a moustache. Or Ian Curtis naked in Cairo, half past three in the morning.” And we love Swiss producer Kalabrese’s remix of “Power To The Women Of The Morning Shift ”, which sounds like the kind of idiosyncratic psycho disco that Andy Weatherall would use to kick off a set. Get your ears around this!

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Music Montag: The One-Hit Parade : überlinüberlin

Music Montag: The One-Hit Parade

by James Glazebrook

A Pet Shop Boys jingle? The One-Hit Parade is not messing around! The new season of what is probably the best, certainly the most kitsch, showcase of upcoming Berlin artists has just wrapped up. If you’re stuck for time, check out the above trailer – but we absolutely recommend watching the whole season, posted below. Of the ten cherry-picked pop acts, look out for our favourites: art rapper Black Cracker (who I had no idea lived in Berlin!), dub queen Anika, minimal weirdo Christian Naujoks and po-faced, iPad-headed robot rocker Wellness.

Music Montag: Lust and Sound in West Berlin – überlin

Music Montag: Lust and Sound in West Berlin

by James Glazebrook

Music activist Mark Reeder selects tracks from the 80s underground, to celebrate the release of his film “B-Movie: Lust & Sound in West Berlin”. Featuring Bowie, Einstürzende Neubauten and lesser known artists, this was originally posted on Red Bull Music Academy (tracklist here).

Mark Reeder grew up in Manchester, England, and just at the turn of his twenties, he moved to Berlin, after co-founding The Frantic Elevators with Neil Moss and Mick Hucknall. It wasn’t long before Mark had formed his synth wave band Die Unbekannten, while he was also Factory Records’ German representative, and general cultural activist around the Berlin Wall – he took the popular UK TV show The Tube around Berlin, organized gigs behind the Iron Curtain and wrote the soundtrack music and played a leading role in Jörg Buttgereit’s controversial movie Nekromantik 2. As well as being the founder and owner of the first East German electronic dance music label MFS (Masterminded For Success), he also mentored a young Paul van Dyk, helping the DJ to his world-conquering career. Apart from remixing several groups, such as Depeche Mode, Pet Shop Boys and John Foxx, he has also made the film B Movie: Lust & Sound In West-Berlin, a documentary about the city’s hedonistic melting pot of music.

Mark Reeder 80s West Berlin

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Music Montag: Lust and Sound in West Berlin – überlin

Music Montag: Lust and Sound in West Berlin

by James Glazebrook

Music activist Mark Reeder selects tracks from the 80s underground, to celebrate the release of his film “B-Movie: Lust & Sound in West Berlin”. Featuring Bowie, Einstürzende Neubauten and lesser known artists, this was originally posted on Red Bull Music Academy (tracklist here).

Mark Reeder grew up in Manchester, England, and just at the turn of his twenties, he moved to Berlin, after co-founding The Frantic Elevators with Neil Moss and Mick Hucknall. It wasn’t long before Mark had formed his synth wave band Die Unbekannten, while he was also Factory Records’ German representative, and general cultural activist around the Berlin Wall – he took the popular UK TV show The Tube around Berlin, organized gigs behind the Iron Curtain and wrote the soundtrack music and played a leading role in Jörg Buttgereit’s controversial movie Nekromantik 2. As well as being the founder and owner of the first East German electronic dance music label MFS (Masterminded For Success), he also mentored a young Paul van Dyk, helping the DJ to his world-conquering career. Apart from remixing several groups, such as Depeche Mode, Pet Shop Boys and John Foxx, he has also made the film B Movie: Lust & Sound In West-Berlin, a documentary about the city’s hedonistic melting pot of music.

Mark Reeder 80s West Berlin

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Music Montag: Jamaica Suk : überlinüberlin

Music Montag: Jamaica Suk

by James Glazebrook

Jamaica Suk

Jamaica Suk is originally from California, but her music was born for Berlin. Just check out “Qurated”, the title track of the EP of the same name, recently released on Tim Xavier’s Face to Face Recordings imprint. Suk may have studied jazz and played in psych, shoegaze and math rock bands, but today she is laser-focused on rolling, big room techno. Get a free download of “Qurated” and hear more crisp productions on Jamaica Suk’s SoundCloud.

Music Montag: HYENAZ : uberlinuberlin

Music Montag: HYENAZ

by James Glazebrook

Chaos © Jule Roehr

Chaos © Jule Roehr

We’re very excited to introduce HYENAZ, the other-wordly, gender-straddling new project from TUSK:

The beats and basslines lift from early house, EBM and R&B; the vocals from soul, blues and prog-rock; the lyrics are punk poetry, cutups — the calls of a cybernetic siren. Synthesizers are built from discarded scraps of metal and 90s nostalgia. Their performance, their visual art and their texts cull from the discarded fabrics of their surroundings, felt and reinterpreted through their bodies. HYENAZ are one, defiled and immaculate, their androgynous flesh quivering on the thin edge between the digital and the divine.

For a glimpse at the HYENAZ universe, watch the video for “Cypher”, in which a transgendered Pierrot morphs into a humanoid hyena. It’s a weird, and oddly placid, clip, for the least singley-single imaginable, but as an introduction to the cosmic, androgynous duo, it’s sheer perfection:

And if you want to hear the intergalactic boy-things channeling the spirit of Anne Clark, listen to Hyenaz’ first single “Sister”/”Reading”:

HYENAZ release their eponymous debut album through Freudian/Slit this Friday, February 13th, with a record launch party at Urban Spree.

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One Response to “Music Montag: HYENAZ”

  1. Eric Noble says:

    Love it James very psychedelic !!!

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Music Montag: DNA BLN #2 : überlinüberlin

Music Montag: DNA BLN #2

by James Glazebrook

Candice Gordon Berlin

DNA BLN is one of the best places to catch up-and-coming bands in Berlin. Last year’s inaugural edition introduced us to Losers, a band we love so much we played them on the very first Radio überlin. This time around, we’re looking forward to discovering another handful of hot new acts including… the fierce Candice Gordon (pictured), Lion Sphere – who splice Peter Gabriel world vibes with alt-J, and are every bit as good as that sounds – and Metryk, who specialise in darkly beautiful synth pop. Here’s a playlist of all the acts appearing on the night, and all the event details you need. See you in Magnet!

DNA BLN Launch Party [Facebook event]
Thursday 26th March, 8pm
Magnet Club, Falckensteinstr. 48, 10997 Berlin, Germany

Music Montag: André Uhl, "Black Box/Outside" – überlin

Music Montag: André Uhl, “Black Box/Outside”

by James Glazebrook

André Uhl live

André Uhl is one of Berlin’s most gifted electronic producers. Since we last featured him, he’s been working on getting his live performance tight, as evidenced by these shots of his moody audiovisual sets. His latest release, out today on Bad Panda records, is typical of his meticulous style, with darkly cinematic synthscapes woven through with deep, intricate percussion. Listen to “Black Box” and “Outside” right here, and visit André Uhl’s Bandcamp to download the tracks. Start off your Monday mean and moody!

AnJem1

Lucy and Bron's Big Berlin Festival Guide : uberlinuberlin

Lucy and Bron’s Big Berlin Festival Guide

by James Glazebrook

Want to go to a Berlin festival, but don’t know which one? Never fear, because Lucy of Lucy vs. the Globe / Sexpat and the City fame has teamed up with her partner in crime, fellow Aussie “ripper” Bron, to explain which of the festivals in and around Berlin will meet your particular party requirements. Fill a colostomy bag with vodka, pack some toilet rolls, and get your head around Lucy and Bron’s Big Berlin Festival Guide! 

Lucy and Bron do Berlin festivals

MELT! (SOLD OUT) – out of Berlin but not that far.
19 – 21 July

We pretty much classify Melt! as a Berlin festival, even though it is out in Gräfenhainichen, about an hour from the city. The line-up this year is MASSIVE. I don’t care if you do or don’t vibe camping and seeing music – this is a big one. Frankly,  I’m most looking forward to Mt. Kimbie, DIIV, , James Blake, DJ Koze and like a 1000 others. Seriously, the list is like band after band after band that I want to see. Bron and I will be there – come find us, say hi – we can drink cheap vodka and get around terrible festival food! Shit’s JUST sold out, so if you get the feelings for a good bit of camping and disco hit up Craigslist/ebay Kleinanzeigen…
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BERLIN ATONAL
25 – 31 July

This one has special moments written all over it, as the legendary Berlin Atonal festival returns after a 23 year shut-eye. First kicking off in 1982 in then West Berlin, organised by Dimitri Hegemann (Herr. Tresor), this pioneering event will now take place in the suitably dramatic setting of an abandoned power plant, Kraftwerk Berlin. Living up to its legacy of unique performances the 2013 edition will feature the likes of (deep breath)…. techno godfather Juan Atkins alongside Basic Channel’s Moritz von Oswald, John Hassel, Brandt Brauer Frick, Francesco Tristano, Voices from the Lake (Donato Dozzy and Neel), Vladislav Delay, Kanding Ray, Raime, Kassem Mosse, Actress, Vatican Shadow and even more. In short – see something special in a killer setting.
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Kraftwerk Berlin

GREENVILLE – out of Berlin but not that far
26 – 28 July

A musical mixed bag with a target audience I can’t quite figure out, Greenville is your least dancey of all these flavours. From Wu-Tang Clan to the Bloodhound Gang (?!), this is one that will keep you guessing for its full three day run. The big draw card for us? Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds – we just wanna see the great man sing “Into My Arms” and hold a stranger really fucking tightly ’til we cut off their blood circulation. It all happens out at Brandenburg – to be honest, it’s not really our thing… but maybe it’s yours?
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DOCKVILLE – out of Berlin but not that far.
16-18 August

I find it slightly difficult to understand all the nuances of this month-long (?) festival in Hamburg, as their info is mostly in Deutsch, which I don’t speak. BUT the black and white is that they are bringing art to an open forum, for artists to come together and contribute to an open air gallery to the masses. Dockville comes to a head on the weekend of 16-18 August with live music, drinks and probably a lot of mud – as shit’s held in a slightly underdeveloped area of Hamburg, which, God only knows, isn’t exactly blessed with the best weather. There are actually HEAPS of really cool acts going to Dockville, like MS MR, T.E.E.D., Crystal Fighters, When Saints Go Machine, and like really – HEAPS MORE. It’s worth the train ride, and a night in a hotel. I mean – who doesn’t like a cheeky weekender?
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NATION OF GONDWANA – out of Berlin but not that far.
20 – 21 July

A non-stop house and techno See-side love-in with a strong waft of escapism in the air, this Grünefeld outlier is best suited to those with a bucketload of stamina. Having run since the late 2000s, this part-time paradise has built up quite a following with a slew of regulars returning year after year. The festivities really kick off Saturday afternoon, with headliners usually taking to the main stage around midday Sunday. This smaller scale, mostly Deutsch affair is appealing, with this year’s line-up including Beda, Gerd Janson. Der Dritte Raum (live), Joel Mull, Cari Lekebusch, Alex.Do, Monika Kruse, Dominik Eulberg, Mano Le Tough, Sven Dohse, a lake, swimming, camping, market stalls and 40 hours of a fucking good time.
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Nation of Gondwana

AEROPHILIA – out of Berlin but not that far.
2 – 5 August

With its former mining site vastness and sweet beats around a lake vibe, it’s hard to avoid a few Melt! comparisons here. Hell, Aerophilia even has a big old conveyor bridge (11,000 Tonnen Stahl yo!). But what it lacks in Melt!-esque musical variety, Aerophilia promises to make up for in a smaller-scale carefully-selected (mostly) house affair. Berlin label Kallius are inviting a solid list of names to their debut event, with draws including Motor City Drum Ensemble, Amine Edge, Mano le Tough, Move D, Dapayk Solo (live) and Kink (live, and also my favourite Bulgarian!). It’s all very manageable, with a local flavour – and if it really kicks off, you’ve got debut-year bragging rights. Huzzah.
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TORSTRASSEN FESTIVAL
31 August

OK – so the cool thing about Torstrassen, is that it’s so local it’s almost sickening. It’s right around the corner, the tickets are cheap as chips, and you have access to some really cool acts like Iberia, Awesome Tapes From Africa, Millennium Millennium and more popping up all over Mitte.
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BERLIN MUSIC WEEK
4 – 8 September

Berlin Music Week is the week in Berlin when it’s like 100% music, and nothing much else. It’s kind of like when Fashion Week happens, and everyone is all of a sudden interested in fashion. This year it seems that the official Music Week activities have pretty much been curated by Melt! which I can’t figure out if I love or hate. But what is cool is that you have all sorts of little loosely-affiliated showcases popping up all over the city, that are running with the Music Week theme, beating to the sound of their own drum. There is literally tonnes going on here – so just pencil it and watch the Internet around this time.
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OUR / BERLIN MUSIC WEEK
4 – 6 September

OK – so this is literally for everyone because it’s sporting a few things:

  1. 3 days of Scandinavian ONLY music
  2. 3 days of beautiful (Nordic) people
  3. Good vodka.

This one is proudly brought to you by Our / Berlin Vodka and the turtle doves over at Nordic by Nature. Running in conjunction with Berlin Music Week, this will be a nice off-the-beaten-path retreat. No acts are confirmed yet – but what I know? Five acts a day, for three days straight. PURE BLISS.
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BERLIN FESTIVAL
6 – 7  September

Berlin Festival is the pillar of Music Week, wrapping everything up over the weekend with all sorts of varied acts. To be honest, looking through the list, it’s a kind of weird, but lovely, group. From SOHN to Hoodie Allen to My Bloody Valentine to Pantha du Prince – the acts somehow all make sense, but absolutely don’t, all at the same time. It’s going down at Templehof, so if the weather is banging summer vibes, there won’t be a better place to be. I mean – who actually doesn’t love to consume music at an old abandoned airport?
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Berlin Festival

BERLIN MUSIC DAYS
6 – 10 November

This is kind of a long way off, but what you are going to find at BerMuda is four days of alles electronic music with workshop and industry shiz by day, and club takeovers by night. The week culminates in a heavy hitting bash at Flughafen Templehof – Fly Bermuda, with a number of local faves returning year after year to annihilate those airport hangers. This year’s program for both the week and Fly Bermuda are still TBA…. but what you can expect…? Lots of homegrown electronic flavour.
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One Response to “Lucy and Bron’s Big Berlin Festival Guide”

  1. Elisa says:

    Very helpful post, thank you! I only miss “Die Neuen DeutschPoeten” Which is a different type of fetsival, because it’s all about german bands, but they are totally worth it. http://www.dieneuendeutschpoeten.com/

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Learn High-end Retouching with Pratik Naik at überlin! – überlin

Learn High-end Retouching with Pratik Naik at überlin!

by Zoë Noble

Pratik Naik High End Retouching Workshop

I’ve been a massive fan of Pratik Naik for years. One of the best high-end retouchers working today, he’s been instrumental in my development and an inspiration for the kind of sleek-yet-natural aesthetic I aspire to. That’s why we’re really excited to announce that Pratik will be leading a one-day retouching workshop in our überlin photo studio.

During this workshop, which will focus on high-end beauty and fashion retouching, Pratik will share his workflow, techniques and the basis for his aesthetic decisions. The event will develop across one intense day of work and will showcase Pratik’s tricks for optimising the use of Adobe Photoshop CS5 (or higher). If you can’t make it to the workshop, but you want to meet other retouchers and photographers, Pratik and I will be hosting a meetup on the following day (details TBC).

Click through for all the details about the Pratik Naik High End Retouching Workshop, hosted by überlin. As readers of ours, you get a super special deal – use the offer code uberlin2015 on checkout to get 15% off the regular ticket price.

Looking forward to meeting you, and learning some advanced retouching skills! (nerd alert)

How to work at a startup: 3. Cover letter and social media – überlin

How to work at a startup: 3. Cover letter and social media

by Guest Blogger

By Federico Prandi.

Ever wondered why cover letters are called cover letters?

That’s because they’re a cover-up, a fraud, a final attempt to reinforce all the lies you’ve shamelessly written on your resume and spice them up with some hardcore lip service. A good cover letter is something you can’t have your wife and children read without them thinking you’re willing to trade your family for a part-time customer service job at an internet startup.

Now, in order to write a convincing cover letter you have to be able to write a regular one. I know that nobody writes proper letters anymore, but in our childhood we’ve all done it in (at least) two specific circumstances.

#1 Love Letters

I remember middle school as the place where my first literary attempts took place. All the guys were pouring their hormonal intensity into odes to girls who either wouldn’t let them touch their breasts or didn’t have breasts at all. One of my letters was so successful that a 12-year-old girl in my class pulled me aside and kissed me, making death poems suddenly look like a better idea.

#2 Letters to Santa

Growing up in a catholic family, I could either write my Christmas wishes to Santa or to baby Jesus. I always picked the former, assuming that the old man wouldn’t be up to date with my sins. In hindsight I feel like I was never really filled in on the magic of Christmas and as a result all my letters to Santa sounded like financial scam against a vulnerable senior, as if I had to convince him to spend all his pension on my presents. Also, I probably looked down on Jesus, thinking that a baby born in a shed wouldn’t be able to discern between the real Little Mermaid merchandise and those cheap rip-offs.

Anyway, the perfect cover letter takes something from both examples; it combines the pained longing of the teenage love letter and the manipulative hidden agenda of the Santa letter; it makes big promises but also claims big rewards; it tells a company that you’ll be their dream, you’ll be their wish, you’ll be their fantasy. You’ll be their hope, you’ll be their love, be everything that they need. You’ll love them more with every breath (truly, madly, deeply do), you will be strong, you will be faithful ’cause you’re counting on a new beginning, a reason for living, a deeper meaning, yeah.

Template

Dear NAME_OF_RECRUITER,

My name is Federico Prandi Barry LaVaughn [PRO TIP: use a name that oozes out awesomeness: fake IDs aren’t as expensive as you think!] and I’m applying for the position of Online Marketing Manager after applying to three others and being rejected finding the job posting on some random Reddit thread the company website.

I’ve spent the past year watching every season of Survivor on my couch traveling around the world, but now I need money feel like it’s time for a new professional challenge. I’ve been keeping an eye on NAME_OF_COMPANY for the past seven minutes, while simultaneously shopping on Amazon years and I was always impressed by your constant achievements in terms of growth and marketing efforts.

Before traveling, I worked for two months years at a marketing agency whose main focus are on-site and off-site SEO. When the company started offering a wider range of services, the fact that I have a Twitter account with more than 6 followers my holistic approach to online marketing came especially handy and I was given new responsibilities. My professional path gave me practical experience in stalking people online conducting detailed on-site audits, developing actionable inbound marketing strategies and researching keywords in a clever way. My team left the boat before it sank swayed between “very small” and a “one-man-show”, which made me cry in the shower at night called for crazy organizational skills, high versatility and alcoholism a talent for setting priorities.

In my private time I tend to read and write Harry Potter erotic fanfic in a lot of online places (forums, blogs, e-zines, online newspapers, social media…you name it!); this gave me a very sharp sensitivity when it comes to anything futile in life contemporary online trends and the language of the web.

Having read the profile you’re looking for, I am going to ignore all the requirements I don’t have and apply anyway think I might be a valuable asset to your team and at the same time have a chance to grow as a marketer.

I look forward to hearing back from you and dive deeper into the selection process.

Best,

Barry

Ta-da! You’re all set!

You have the perfect CV, the perfect cover letter and you’re now ready to pack everything together and send your application via email.

Bonus Track: Clean up your social media

via GIPHY

Actually.

There is one more little thing that needs to be done in order to make your application really really perfect.

Hire a private investigator (or me if I’m bored) and ask him to turn the internet upside down in search of some dirt about you. As much as you consider yourself an amazing human being, that time you made fun of coat-hanger abortions on Twitter may not be well perceived by everybody.

Delete the tweet and, since you’re at it, replace it with a photoshopped picture of you hugging a koala bear (which, in my opinion, is exactly what restored Luke Perry’s public image after 90210).

Bingo – you’re all set!

Federico is an Italian in Berlin. He blogs, tweets, infiltrates the German language, and is currently employed at a cool internet company based in Berlin with a million open positions.

If you liked this, read the rest of the series here. And check out our observations on the Berlin startup scene, and get more practical advice about landing a startup job (with more GIFs!).

Let's make Comedy Café Berlin a reality!

Help make Berlin’s first alternative comedy stage a thing!

by James Glazebrook

Comedy Café Berlin - before

This is exciting! One of the brothers behind the hilarious piffle! podcast is currently turning this old Kneipe into Berlin’s first alternative comedy stage, the unimaginatively-titled Comedy Café Berlin (way to improv, guys). It’s going to be located in the heart of hipster central, on Neukölln’s Weserstraße, and will feature a café and bar alongside a theatre to showcase the stars of Berlin’s up-and-coming international comedy scene. As well as live standup, sketch and improv, this new institution for comedy will host workshops and courses for anyone who wants to polish up their funning skills.

With construction already under way, the team are raising money to pay for important stuff like soundproofing. To help secure the future of this promising project, check out the Comedy Café Berlin Kickstarter, where rewards include the chance to get your name on the Wall of Fame, one of the theatre’s 60 seats, a menu item, or even its toilets (“Name of Thrones”!). When you’re giggling it up in Berlin’s most awesome new nightspot, you can thank your past self for being so generous and, let’s face it, smart. DO IT.